Here she is:
Also in the last month, my meeting went on a retreat in Highland County. Let me just say: I knew I was headed for a relapse when I went. I knew it was a mistake to not only physically separate myself from my support (OA), but to also put myself in a position where I wouldn't be able to reach out for help because there is no cell phone reception in Highland County. There was a landline where we were staying, but it was in the kitchen , and there was no privacy. There was something sugary served at every single meal. My meeting knows I'm a sugar addict, but they don't take that seriously. One even makes fun of it. I shouldn't have gone. I found myself in complete relapse. I gained six pounds that weekend. I have struggled to regain my sugar abstinence since then, and so far, I'm losing.
Then, this past weekend, we had visitors at the meeting, so we all had to have lunch. For the most part the lunch was good and healthy. Well, first one woman was again mocking the very idea of sugar addiction saying that our cells need a certain amount of sugar to be healthy. I told her our cells do not need refined sugar or high fructose corn syrup since our ancestors got along fine without those things for millenia. Any sugar we "need" can be found in fruit and vegetables. Anyway, desert was chocolate cake. But, there was also strawberries and whipped cream. Only after I after I ate a serving of strawberries did they tell me that sugar had been added - and laughed. Nice.
Anyway, I wrote a letter to my meeting saying I didn't feel I had their support or even their respect when it came to my recovery and that I will not eat with them anymore. Period. I'm sorry. I've tried. It just doesn't work. I see the incident with the strawberries as a serious breach of trust and deliberate sabotage. It wasn't just thoughtlessness. They wouldn't slip me some Jack Daniels if I were an alcoholic, but to slip a sugar addict sugar - that's funny.
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